Being Church: Part 1
by Robert Martin
Just last week, I returned from a 3 week trip to Nepal. Yes, that Nepal, one of the poorest countries in the world, sandwiched between India and China, split from its spiritual cousin, Tibet, by the towering majesty of Mount Everest and the rest of the Himalayan range. If you have perused the “World” section in the New York Times last week, you will have seen that Nepal is convulsing with political unrest as violent protests erupted in the capital, Kathmandu.
The trip was very difficult in many ways, but it was also one of the most inspirational of my life. I went to teach in a Christian church and school for ministry (Bishram Ministries) that was founded only 7 years ago. I’ll have more to say about that in a later blog, but as I reflected on my experiences with that wonderful and amazing community, I realized that I was returning a very different person. For you see, the ministry I visited in Nepal was the closest I’ve ever come to experiencing the church as described in Acts 1-4. Now, I realize that there are problems and conflicts in every community, even in the early church (remember that Ananias and Sapphira were struck dead in Acts 5; so much for spiritual harmony in the church!), but the Bishram community is the most vivid example I’ve encountered of a people in communion, giving their all, and transforming their world.
My experience in Nepal brought to mind other experiences I’ve had of church,
of church as a verb,
of being church,
of church as a sacrificial and shared life in Christ.
So in this and the next 2 blogs, I’ll talk about 3 experiences of being church in ways that are somewhat different from traditional, congregational life. Perhaps these reflections will help you recall your own experiences of spiritual vitality and challenge that you might not have associated with being church. And then perhaps, just perhaps, we can bring those experiences into our congregations, and shake up the usual suspects and usual practices and allow God to do a new thing among us.
1. Being Church as Doubting Believers
For just over a year I have been acting as the leader of a small covenant discipleship group. But it is a rather odd assortment of folks; they are not the usual suspects. When I think of the kinds of people who would gravitate toward one of these intimate settings of spiritual formation, I imagine that they are ardent believers who are looking for just a little deeper walk with God.
But in this group, it is safe to say only one person in our group might qualify, just barely, for the “ardent believer” type. The rest of them are struggling more with doubt than resting firmly in faith. These are people who are active in an urban congregation but who don’t feel all that spiritual. They want to believe, but the theology of their church doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to them. They believe in God but their concept of God is vague and it is difficult for them to talk about. They don’t know what to do with Jesus, especially the claim about his divinity. Forget the Holy Spirit; it’s just too spooky. When it comes time to pray, they don’t know how or even why to do it. Reciting the Apostle’s Creed makes them feel like they are lying or just going through the motions. For the most part, these folks are drawn to the moral and political mission of this congregation. The greatest common denominator among this group is their passionate commitment to social justice, their love for one another, and the fact that they are all leaders in the congregation.
You might wonder: what in the world is this group of agnostics doing in the church, and how did they get to be LEADERS in the church? I don’t know. But the surprising thing to me is that when I get together with them for conversation, meditation, and study, I feel like I’m in church; that we are doing church. I feel that our gathering is more like church than anything else I do during the week – and I’m a seminary professor, ordained, and a regular participant in a congregation!
Before I came to Saint Paul School of Theology in Kansas City, I taught for 6 years at Yale Divinity School, where the student body was quite a bit more diverse. Because the Divinity School was part of the University, we had a good number of students who were agnostic and even atheist. They were usually the most interesting, engaged, and thoughtful students in the classroom. And I enjoyed them immensely. They asked the difficult questions and were not content with easy answers. They didn’t buy into the standard party line of churchy propaganda. For many of our more dogmatic students, they were trouble-makers and nay-sayers. In many respects, though, they were secular prophets in that supposedly “sacred” space. They were refreshing breeze that cleared away much of the traditioned fog that we churchy people feel so comfortable in.
When our Kansas City group of doubters and questioners gather, it is refreshing. There is less tolerance for fuzzy doctrine and irrelevant tradition. There is greater honesty and truth proclaimed, there is a greater sharing of life, and there is greater potential for transformation than just about anywhere I go throughout the week. They ask tough questions; they are not satisfied with routine answers. They are spiritually attuned without being able to readily describe it. They know God, but they don’t know what to call the mysterium tremendum. They serve God but in ways that traditional mainline Protestantism hardly recognizes as spiritual. And their lives reflect a strong commitment to shalom, to a peaceful wellbeing for all. When we pray together – despite its awkwardness – the Spirit visits.
I love – even crave – the time we share in covenant.
Like all communities, this group is not perfect; it is not ideal. Some are more committed than others; some are struggling to carve out enough time. For some, the spiritual practices of our covenant are not as meaningful as they would like. A few of our members are wondering if they should give up on “church” altogether because it is largely irrelevant and so much of what happens on Sunday and in “church” seems anachronistic.
But still, this little band of doubting believers meet week after week, sharing our lives with one another, exploring the faith, holding each other up before God, struggling with making sense of life and of our life in God, and striving to live more fully in the sacred dimension of this incredibly secular world.
Next blog: Being church in the wilderness.